Posted by peterska2 on Apr 14, 2009 in
Quitting Smoking Diary at 11:50 pm
Well it’s official. I have given up on quitting smoking and am smoking again. I was doing quite well apart from a couple of hiccups but due to the fact that my stress levels were spiraling out of control and nothing else was working at all for controling them, I’ve given in and am smoking again. Maybe it just wasn’t the right time with other things that are going on at the moment (I can’t talk about them though as I am bound by NDA’s for then all) but I will try again in a few months. I really do want to kick the habit. I hate smoking, but it is about the only thing that does help with keeping my stress levels at manageable levels. I’m disappointed in myself but I know that I will be able to give up eventually - it is just all about timing really and the timing was wrong this attempt.
Tags: disappointed, given up, smoking, stopping smoking, stress
Posted by peterska2 on Apr 4, 2009 in
Quitting Smoking Diary at 6:16 am
Ok so I failed and messed up and ended up buying a pack of smokes. It isn’t something that I’m proud of.
But I’m picking myself back up, brushing myself off, and trying again. I can’t let one screw up mean that I am a complete failure.
Tags: stopping smoking
Posted by peterska2 on Mar 27, 2009 in
Quitting Smoking Diary at 4:39 pm
Well it’s been almost 2 weeks now and although there have been a few times that I felt like giving in, I haven’t done and I’m feeling really proud of myself for that. My quitting buddy also hasn’t given in, so it’s a double result.
Aiming to make it to 3 weeks now!!
Tags: quitting smoking
Posted by peterska2 on Mar 16, 2009 in
Quitting Smoking Diary at 9:40 am
Up to 51.5 hours now since my last smoke. I didn’t think I would make it this long, so really happy with my progress despite the fact that it is really hard work!
I really think that if I can get to 72 hours then it should start getting a lot easier, but that isn’t far away now really so fingers crossed.
Its funny though, I’m already missing smokes with certain things. Like hanging out clothes on the washing line was always accompanied by a smoke. So was making drinks - thats the worst one as every time I put the kettle or the coffee pot on I would have a drink while waiting for it. The big test though is going to be distance driving. I’ve drove into town with a smoke, but thats only a 5-10 min drive and not one that I always had a smoke doing anyway. It’s the long drives that are going to be very hard as they always have been prime smoking time, after all there are only so many things that you can do while driving a car!
Today is going to be a funny day as well as probably the worst day, so its going to be very interesting to see how it plays out and if I am still as determined by the end of it. I really don’t want to cave in, but you never can tell what is going to happen.
Tags: coffee, cravings, day 3, driving, progress, stopping smoking, struggling, withdrawals
Posted by peterska2 on Mar 16, 2009 in
Quitting Smoking Diary at 1:51 am
Just when I thought that I couldn’t possibly feel any worse - I started feeling worse! It’s amazing how much your body complains when you change things. The withdrawals are really kicking in hard now and starting to replace the cravings. I sure know why they say that willpower is totally a requirement and that if you don’t have any willpower that you will fail.
As the day has gone on, I’ve felt worse and worse. Now this isn’t helped by funny schedules for the last few days which have disrupted my sleep pattern. I’ve nearly surrendered a few times but by having to go and buy more smokes I can’t kid myself into thinking that it will just one smoke and no more.
I’m exhausted, got a banging headache, feel like death warmed up. Gonna try and have a nap then I can get back to everything as normal afterwards.
Tags: day 3, headache, shaky, stopping smoking, tired, withdrawals
Posted by peterska2 on Mar 15, 2009 in
Quitting Smoking Diary at 9:11 pm
OMG! It is so hard at the moment. I really really want a smoke! I haven’t told my family yet that I’ve stopped smoking as I don’t want to disappoint them if I happen to fail. I just want a smoke so badly though that I could cave in very easily right now. Really need some encouragement to stick at it and can’t wait to speak with my quitting buddy later. Wish me luck because I don’t want to give in but really think I might.
Tags: day 3, struggling
Posted by peterska2 on Mar 15, 2009 in
Quitting Smoking Diary at 2:01 pm
While in the supermarket this morning I was looking at the boiled sweets and saw mini sugar free lollipops. What a great buy! I was really gagging for a smoke so as soon as they had been paid for they were opened and one unceremoniously stuck in my mouth. What a god send! Not only are they boiled sweets, but they are also sticks/straws which can be chewed on and they can also be waved about quite happily if you need something to do with your hands.
I’ve still not caved in and given up, and I’m totally determined to stick at it no matter how hard it gets.
I think though now my body is realizing that there is something going on, so the next 24-36 hours are going to be my body complaining as well as my mind complaining which is what it has been so far.
Tags: cravings, day 2, lollipops, stopping smoking, straws, sweets, withdrawals
Posted by peterska2 on Mar 15, 2009 in
Quitting Smoking Diary at 5:02 am
Well it’s just gone 5am which means that it is 23 hours since I last had a smoke. I hadn’t realized just how hard quitting would be! I’m doing my best not to cave in but it is really hard. It doesn’t help that I am trying to not use the lozenges either but they are expensive so they have to last the whole week. After all they cost nearly as much as cigs themselves so if I use them too quick then it actually defeats the object of trying to save money!
It’s funny though - I feel really restless. Have had to go out for a walk just to try and settle myself again. It’s nice walking when it’s dark the roads are dead quiet and all the birds are singing. It makes me feel really peaceful. Hopefully I’ll settle again and be able to carry on with my work because after all if I don’t work then I don’t get paid!
I’m not gonna cave in. Especially not so close to being a full 24 hours gone and so getting closer already to that first week being over. I could really do with some encouragement though so any comments would be really appreciated.
Tags: day 2, restless, stopping smoking, struggling, unsettled, walking
Posted by peterska2 on Mar 15, 2009 in
Quitting Smoking Diary at 12:54 am
I always laughed at people who said that they used a straw when stopping smoking. It turns out that it’s a great idea! Suck a straw and use a lozenge at the same time. It’s not a bad combination. Of course I’m not planning on using a straw for long because it does look rather silly. Saying that though it might be a good thing to use when I’m on a long journey as driving without a smoke is going to be probably the hardest part.
I’ve not broken yet and given in though. I reckon if I can make it for a week then I should be able to stick at it this time instead of giving up like I did last time I tried.
Tags: cravings, day 2, stopping smoking, straws
Posted by peterska2 on Mar 14, 2009 in
Quitting Smoking Diary at 11:03 pm
It seems that it is too early to give up my rituals that I have for having a smoke. I always smoke outside, never in the house. So here I am eating a mint and blogging from the garden because it felt too weird not needing to go outside! I can almost see this becoming the new ritual for me!
Tags: cravings, day 2, quitting smoking, rituals
